You Know You're a Mom When...
>> Friday, February 3, 2012 –
Just James,
Parenting
Does anyone else remember "The Family Circus" that would appear in the comics every Sunday? (It's possible that it is still around, but we don't get the paper; who has time to read it anyway?) Every once in a while, the comic would read: "It's apparent your a parent" and then it would go on to show all the tell-tale signs that signal to others that you indeed have offspring. It was pretty cute.
Lately, I have been thinking of several of my own:
1. You need to squeeze past someone in public, so you blurt out: "Beep, beep!"
2. Your phone, sunglasses, and camera are constantly covered in little finger prints.
3. Your own clothes shopping is done at Costco. As one mom friend said to me "...I mean, you're already there..." (Did anyone else recently pick up that eight dollar DKNY hoodie? No? Just me?)
4. You sing obnoxious songs that you learn from your child's toys. Lane came into the kitchen the other day serenading me with: "The Weebles weeble-wobble, but they don't fall down... The weebles! The weebles!"
5. You carry Kleenex (mostly used) and a binky in every handbag and every pocket of every jacket you own.
6. You leave the house with a really obvious wardrobe malfunction... obvious to everyone else anyway. Here is a small sampling of some of my own clothing issues: deodorant on the outside of my armpits on my shirt (so distracted by a little one, I forgot to reach inside my shirt while applying), inside-out clothing, taking off my jacket and realizing that what is underneath should have never been paired with my pants/shoes (i.e. brown on brown on brown- yikes).... the list could go on.
7. You decide to stop by a popular clothing store while on a romantic getaway with your spouse and buy nothing over the size 4T.
8. You use the words "bink" and "nums" in casual conversation with other adults.
9. Your main concerns when house hunting become proximity to parks and libraries, safety of stairways, and school ratings.
10. You do all you can to stifle it, but bust out laughing when anyone who doesn't have a child tells you how exhausted they are.
... I am sure you moms can think of plenty to add to my list. I would love to hear them!
If you are unprepared (like me) and don't have a baby wipe, you actually lick food off your kids hands to clean them. (guilty! And embarrassed!) love your list... Especially the exhausted one. ;-)
I did that yesterday at the park because James had PB and J fingers! hahaha